When Life Gives You Actual Fire (Not Just Metaphorical Ones)
- ekatwrites
- Oct 1
- 6 min read
First: We are okay!
But... there was an electrical fire in one of the bedrooms in June — THANKFULLY no one else was home, and I put it out with a fire extinguisher.
We are verrrrry lucky to still have a home and that we are all safe and alive!!! (I want to record PSAs for everyone!!! Pull the pin and squeeze!! That's it!!! Check your fire extinguishers!)
It was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life, one that I know that I have yet to fully process. (I keep trying to write about it... but tbh, it's still too fresh in my body.) We only JUST found out a few weeks ago what caused the fire -- a tree branch broke and destroyed the grounding wire that connects from our house to the city-- which also explains the disturbing Stranger Things flashing effects that preceded the smoke and flames (!!!!). The flashing started happening again when the they were sanding the floors a few weeks ago (!!!) The firefighters who came out a few weeks ago agreed that the inital tree branch break could have happened during the January winds. Don't worry! The grounding wire has now been fixed by the city. (Cue second PSA! Please check the wires around your home and neighborhood and report anything that looks concerning!)
The firefighters also said I saved our house and our animals, which feels unreal, knowing that we almost lost our home of twenty-five years. As I write this note, we are still displaced and unsure of when we’ll be able to return-- but we think/ hope that it will be very, very soon!
Of course, my heart is with everyone in our city whose lives were destroyed by much worse this year.
Why "How to Come Out To the Jasmine First" Took a Little Longer Than Expected
Anyway... the fire happened the very same week this book was scheduled to be published. I've spent this summer navigating insurance companies, restoration crews, and the surreal experience of living out of suitcases while being incredibly grateful that we still have a home and that everyone is safe and alive.
My personal upheaval is, of course, occurring alongside multiple global and local human-made crises—undocumented people and immigrants, attacks on LGBTQ+ families and neurodivergent and autistic communities like my own, unending war and famine in multiple regions across the globe--crises whose cruelty and inhumanity directly impact my closest family, dearest friends, and my most beloved community.
This summer, dealing with displacement and insurance paperwork, compounded by the onslaught of horrific headlines, I've had to practice what I preach, especially during a time when I felt I lost the spaces and connectors that have historically provided support, sanctuary, and comfort.
Look for the lovely, even (or especially) when it's hard.
This whole experience has been the most visceral reminder of why I wrote this book in the first place. I wanted to offer short essays, poems, and meditations that gently invite readers to explore their own relationships with the natural world, creativity, and healing.
Especially when everything is insanely chaotic and utterly heartbreaking, and we are longing for any glimmers of hope and connection. Right now, I’m especially thankful to those who helped make this book possible, including my amazing editor, K.E. Ogden. Thank you, as well, dear readers for your pre-orders, patience, and support during this crazy time.
HOW TO COME OUT TO THE JASMINE FIRST
My intention with this book is for readers to feel like they've gone on a brisk walk with me and have entered my little side garden, where four small raised beds and a decades-long collection of perennials, vines, and even berries bloom and blossom two-thirds of the year. In this space, the gifts of the land have absorbed my pain and my sorrows. It's where I talk to my parents, where I imagine their voices guide me back to myself, to the time even before their pain and sorrows seeped into my own awareness. It’s a space where I can feel and write and rage and sometimes claw into the dirt.
It’s also where I share joy, healing, and hope with my family, friends, and community. That is ultimately my hope for you, as well, dear reader.
An Invitation to Your Own Sanctuary (Wherever You Are)
In How to Come Out To the Jasmine First, my intention is to bring this same mindful, aware, and connected approach to nature-based healing.
How to Come Out To the Jasmine First is organized around nature's cycles of planting, growing, releasing, and celebrating—but you don't need a garden to benefit from these practices. Each piece includes gentle invitations for readers to engage with their own experiences, whether that's sitting with a houseplant on a windowsill, walking through their neighborhood with new awareness (our cat, Pumpkin might not fully agree, lol), or—as I discovered this summer—finding moments of peace even when you're sitting on a hotel-adjacent concrete sidewalk near a roaring freeway while anxiously awaiting restoration updates and reimbursement checks.
Whether you're dealing with displacement, insurance nightmares, or simply the daily challenges of being human in uncertain times, this book offers:
Scientific research on nature-based healing woven with personal reflection
Gentle writing prompts that help you explore your own stories
LGBTQ+ perspectives on finding belonging in the natural world
Mindful practices you can do anywhere
I'm honored that this book was edited by the amazing poet, writer, and educator, K.E. Ogden, whose award-winning debut, What the Body Already Knows, is available from Finishing Line Press. I'm also deeeeeeeeply humbled that she offered this advanced praise:
Kottaras creates a safe space for everyone to make joyous noise by accepting her “invitations” to experiment with creative expression, not just on the page but also in the gardens of our own backyards and in the community found in our everyday connections with the natural world.
— K.E. Ogden, Author of What the Body Already Knows
How to Come Out To the Jasmine First: On Writing and Loving in the Natural World is now available! I sincerely hope readers will be able to find your own sanctuary in these pages, and remember: you have permission to create, to heal, and to bloom in your own season—even when life throws literal fires your way.
I'd be deeply grateful if you considered supporting this work by picking up a copy of How to Come Out To the Jasmine First: On Writing and Loving in the Natural World.
Available now
When the world feels overwhelming,
where do you find sanctuary?
In this tender collection of essays, poems, and meditations, E. Katherine Kottaras invites us into her small Los Angeles garden—a place of refuge and renewal during pandemic isolation, family health crises, and the daily challenges of being a queer parent in an uncertain world.
Organized around nature's cycles of planting, growing, releasing, and celebrating, How to Come Out To the Jasmine First weaves together scientific research on nature-based healing with deeply personal poetry and reflections on creativity, identity, and resilience. Each piece includes gentle invitations for readers to explore their own relationships to place, body, and creative expression.
Nature wasn't just a pleasant escape but actual medicine for our wounded bodies and spirits.
AVAILABLE NOW
Add How to Come Out To the Jasmine First on Goodreads.
I also hope you'll join me for this upcoming event in conjunction with my book release, where I'll be leading a queer nature writing workshop!
🌈 Queerly Connected - WE GOT US 🌈
Nurturing Queer Collaboration
It’s messy out there. Good thing our community is safe and warm.
Welcome. We got us.
Join Open Space Therapy Collective (OSTC) and Pals along with many wonderful LGBTQ+ wellness practitioners and space makers for a free event to indulge in the experience of building community with us. Our community needs you. Needs US.
Here’s what to expect:
🎨 Free services + art making
🌱 Experiential workshops by LGBTQ+ wellness practitioners
🤝 Meet new queer friends + expand your network
🌈 Build community with queer practitioners and space makers
😋 Specialty craft food and drinks
💚 Join a queer nature writing class led by meeeee 🥰
This isn’t just another event—it’s a person-first gathering. Come as you are. Connect as you are. Together, we’ll expand queer joy and pull back the curtain on holistic mental health. 💜
We’re strengthening our community, and you should be a part of it. 🤗
Oct 04, 2025, 1:00 PM – 4:00 PM
Los Angeles, 555 N Spring St Ste 106, Los Angeles, CA 90012, USA
Subscribe to The Slow Down Circle, my curated newsletter, for latest updates and invitations to slow down, connect, create, and breathe.
Thank you for reading and for taking a few moments to slow down with me!
Love,
Katherine
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